I give horrible gifts to my friends as does my husband. Luckily for you, we're not your friends and we love to give each other troll gifts, which involves a lot of research into the worst presents to give someone. However, we both love travel and we've found travel inspired gifts that are funny terrible for friends as well as downright horrifying gifts for your enemies. Brace for terrible reactions and messing up your Amazon recommendations forever because we've found out the worst Christmas gifts ever for anyone who loves to travel.
This post contains affiliate links and way too much toilet humor. This is a holiday gift guide for finding the worst gifts ever for your friends who love to travel. Some are moderately funny bad Christmas gifts while others are better suited to presents for your enemies. I hope you laugh a little at this list of horrible gifts for friends mixed in with some travel gag gifts. ;)
Problem: Can't find your suitcase at the airport.
We got you and it's truly terrible not being able to find your suitcase at the airport. Luckily, there's a solution and a terrible gift idea for a loved one. Nothing says this suitcase is mine like an creepy cat suitcase cover. Don't worry: nobody else will have THIS suitcase cover, so you don't need to consider if someone else is giving your friend this terrible gift. Useful and unique.
Problem: Your friend snores when you're sharing a hotel room. It's a dealbreaker.
There's nothing like saying I love you and I wish that you'd stop snoring when we're in the same room to a loved one. This sleeping device is actually a good idea although mildly embarrassing to give at a public gathering.
Problem: Carrying an umbrella is annoying and it's hard to take a good selfie showcasing your travels while holding one.
Carrying an umbrella can be so tough on the hands, so why not wear your umbrella on your head . Keep your hands free to taking selfies more easily!
Sometimes, you don't want your perfect outfit ruined by the rain. Become graceful and free your hands of pesky umbrellas to enjoy ~pure freedom. You don't even need to worry about the wind blowing off your umbrella hat! It's the the perfect Christmas gift for your enemies for less than $10.
Problem: Your friend travels with their dog and their dog always smells bad after getting wet.
Get your friend this handy dog umbrella to prevent their dog from getting wet because this horrible gift for friends is secretly for you. (We don't hide the fact that we're cat people well.)
Problem: Your friend is going on vacation to somewhere with mosquitos and they're prone to getting bit.
Do you have a friend that dreams of becoming Indiana Jones? This hat is the essential first step. As someone who gets eaten alive by mosquitos, I feel you when I wish that I could hide away. That said, you can hide just your face with this handy mosquito proof hat and still have the rest of your body eaten alive while contracting the West Nile virus. One of the worst gifts that you can get for someone who gets bit up like I do.
Problem: Your friend was too cheap to pay for unlimited drinks on the cruise that you're going on.
Sometimes, you want to be stylish, and other times you want to drink wine in public. Luckily, you can now drink wine out of your wine scarf in style while traveling with this handy combination scarf. Just don't wear it through airport security. It will not end well.
For your friend who packs 3 suitcases for 3 days
Who's traveled with that friend who packs three suitcases for 3 days? This jacket is PERFECT for teaching your friend how to pack light by challenging them to go on a trip with what's in their 23 pockets. There's a jacket for that. It even holds your iPad and surprisingly looks decent.
Problem: Your friend is always cold wherever you go.
For your friend who always gets cold no matter where you are, even the desert, these fingerless toast handwarmers are kind of adorable, but I'm not sure that I'm brave enough to wear them in public. Not really a bad gift, but maybe a mildly embarrassing gift.
Problem: You're about to go on a 2 week winter holiday (perhaps to Iceland?) with your significant other.
Tired of seeing someone else's face and want them to stay warm on their cold weather holiday? You can be caring by giving them something useful yet ugly gift. Consider getting a Cthulhu face mask.
For your friend really loves coloring and traveling the world without you.
Have a friend who loves to color while sitting on planes going to destinations that you dream of going to, but they never bring you? We got the perfect gift for y'all. They can learn new words in new languages while coloring. Get them this hilarious Christmas gift.
For your friend who only travels in first class
You gotta live that first class life and if you're into lightly mocking your friend's love of the high life, this funny bad christmas gift is for you. Just think how many times your friend will use these silk suit pajamas while sleeping in their private bed pod in first class while you're stuck in economy.
For selfie lovers
Everyone has that one friend really into selfies. (#nojudgment). We're here to up your travel selfie game with phone perfect lighting and a selfie stick with built in fill lighting (#nextlevelselfie) while lightly making fun of your recipient for their love of selfies. Maybe not the worst gift ever, but it can be a funny bad christmas gift depending on how much you dislike selfies. Also, a great gift for frenemies whose instagram you lightly stalk.
For banana lovers who love to hike or climb (we love carabiners)
Is your SO or friend really bananas about bananas? A banana carrier to-go with a carabiner for those times when you want a banana, but you're too busy adventuring up in the mountains to carry one. Who's heard of backpacks?
For your perpetually single friend and/or your significant other you leave at home for business travel
You know those times that you're traveling solo and your significant other is telling you how much they miss cuddles? Get your significant other a boyfriend (or girlfriend) pillow to snuggle up with while they're doing their business travels. ....I actually own one of these, which was a gift from my husband, who loves gag gifts. I was surprised how creepy yet comfortable it is. Alternatively, this is a funny yet terrible gift for friends who are single.
Friends who get nervous about pickpocketing when traveling abroad
Paranoid about your stuff getting stolen? Panties with a hidden pocket...
There's nothing like putting your hand down your shirt to get out your cash out from in between your bra on a warm day only to hand it to a stranger who has to touch it. Nobody is getting your cash with this hidden wallet.
For a friend who's secretly a Bond villain and a traveler, buy a safety garter to keep their electronics safe from thieves. (I'm not sure it protects against creeps.)
For ladies who love to hike and/or hates sitting down on toilets
Out of all these terrible Christmas gifts for travelers, I have to say that this freeing urination device for women is not a horrible Christmas gift for female travelers to give as I imagine that it can come in quite handy for those who love to hike. That said, the toilet humor makes this potentially a really awkward gift to give at a family gathering.
For messy eaters who love to travel
Messy foodies rejoice: you can eat anything you want without worrying prior to staining your clothes before your travel jump group shot where everyone wears white clothes when you wear one of these three colorful bibs with three delightful patterns.
Looking for a calendar for 2018 and love hiking trips?
Nature is truly beautiful and this nature inspired calendar is a testament to the beauty of nature. Definitely on my list of worst presents to give 99% of people, but perfect for a hilarious and horrible gift for friends (with a specific sense of humor). Definitely a truly inspiring gift for nature lovers with wanderlust!
For pizza lovers who love to travel
For my Italian food lovers and/or anyone planning a trip to Italy, you can't walk around without an extra slice. A pizza pouch is an essential item for those who travel and worry about getting hungry a little later. This pouch that goes around around your neck enables to walk around without worrying about getting hungry!
Are you from Kentucky or do you have a family member from Kentucky? This fried chicken t-shirt is the easiest way to explain to new friends that you meet while traveling where you're from without having to say KFC for the millionth time. As beautifully written by my husband, "That is the best thing ever. Crispy chicken tee shirt omgomgomg." I was kind of hoping it would be one of the worst presents to give to a Kentuckian tired of explaining their relationship to KFC when traveling, but maybe it's secretly awesome.
For your friend who just came back from teaching a year in Asia
A lot of Asian countries have fantastic amazing toilets, however the squat toilet is ....memorable not in a good way. For your friend who just returned from teaching in Asia, the worst christmas gift that you might be able to give is a toilet stool to bring back great memories. It even folds up, so it's perfect for travel!
For your eco-friendly friend who wants to save the Earth
For every hiking trip or road trip, you need snacks. Meat is not sustainable and bugs are our future. Get these cheddar cheese flavored larvets to save the planet.
For your friend who loves Tabasco hot sauce, traveling, and/or camo.
Are you a busy person who loves to travel and you can go nowhere without your Tabasco sauce? A camo-themed Tabasco carrier is essential. You get a free bottle of Tabasco with purchase.
For your significant other who always hogs the arm rest
You know who you are. We cannot share the armrest, so send this subtle slightly horrible gift to a friend/relative who always steals the armrest, so that the next time you sit on a plane together, you can share the armrest. Maybe your next trip won't start off with a fight.
Side note: We witnessed the WORST fight over an armrest after a girl elbowed a random old man over the armrest. This went on for four hours even after she requested to sit in this seat for extra leg room. It was pure insanity.
The worst travel gift ever (or the worst travel inspired gift that I found on Amazon).
Does your friend have a long plane ride ahead of them? They need a toilet bucket.
I'm sorry, this was the single worst gift that we found. I think it's the perfect gift for your enemies or a friend who has a toilet sense of humor with a love for funny bad christmas gifts.
Which one was your favorite? What's been your favorite terrible Christmas gift that you've given or received?
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Karen and Jacob. American expats and cat lovers from New York City and Kentucky who lived in Amsterdam.... Now in Paris with moving back to the Netherlands this month.
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